How are Things?

Tag: cat

  • Monday 18th August 2025

    Nighttime. My son sleeps. Satie’s Gymnopedies 1 plays. The cat is sleeping beside me. I’m so worn out from being responsive to every living thing around me I dread the presence of another.

    Yesterday we came home from a visit with my 84 year old father. He has a new cat, a 4 month old kitten, that he has no idea how to treat. He has given it no toys, and shook it when it scratched him.

    He is a person who cannot give care, only accept it from others. He waited until my son and I had gone to bed (after I cooked, cleaned, tidied, etc), then proceeded to play erotica at such a loud volume (“HE TOOK OFF MY DRESS AS I PANTED WITH JOY”) I could hear it from the floor below. The following morning he told me over breakfast that I was fat .

    On the way back up the cat threw up on the car, making my son hysterical. Then, as we were nearly home, the cat defecated on the back seat, an event that horrified her as much as anyone else. It also meant I couldn’t rest. In 77 degrees I had to pull out the carpet cleaner and get to it, then wash it all out in the bath, then wash the bath. Then empty luggage, clean the cat of vomit, see to my son, and then rest. Only to discover we were out of milk, so I had to go out at 9.30pm again and get some.

    Today, thank goodness, I had a session with my counsellor. She’s been away and I’ve been away, and so it had been awhile. After speaking to her I felt some of the knot in my stomach and in my shoulders go down somewhat, but it is hard to keep my nervous system in check. My son flares up at everything at present, and there isn’t enough hyper-vigilance on the planet to keep him or me going. I wish I had the energy to cry, but that would mean feeling the pressure had come to a conclusion, and that is not yet the case.

  • Sunday 22nd June 2025

    Good evening, all. I’m writing this while under the covers, my cat making herself comfortable at my feet. It is Sunday night, after a busy week, and I wanted to take a few minutes to say hello.

    This week saw me take my car in for testing. Unfortunately it failed, in that the diesel filter needs cleaning and that is a job that takes several thousand euro. I will need to get that arranged, and I am not sure how or when I will be able to find the time.

    My annoying and very unpleasant colleague has finally left the unit. My boss seems to believe that the right thing to do is to have Annoying colleague still on the books in case she is needed. This is annoying, again. And I will have not so much a performance review, but an objective-planning meeting this Tuesday. I actually hate speaking to my boss these days, in that my body actually reacts to it.

    Also this week my son will be leaving his primary school. He is nonchalant about it, in that he seems to feel he will be able to go back and visit at Christmas. Yes, he will, but he will face a very different world in secondary school, one that has a lot of new demands to make on him. I am weepy at the thought of leaving his old school, and I very much pine already for the understanding nature of his teachers. I felt able to exhale there. Now, it is very different, as it has to be. I fear if I show him how large the mountain ahead is, he will lose hope.

    And on Saturday, my son and I took our much loved cat to the vet. She had shown no illness or symptoms but as she had never been to a vet before it seemed the wisest thing. Getting the poor thing on a leash was very hard, and then we had to bring her in the car, another trauma. When we got there, we had to wait for over 45 minutes. Eventually we were told that she has bad teeth, bad hips and needs her vaccinations updated; all told, it comes in as over €1,500. That may have to be done in payments, I think.

    After that, we went to go visit my sister’s child; I’ll tell you all about that interaction next time!