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  • Monday 26th May 2025

    Yesterday I stayed up quite late; later than I should. It meant that when the alarm went at 5am this morning, I was already exhausted. It is such a strange form of defiance, staying up late; the only person I harm is myself.

    I managed to get up, exercise and to update my subreddit, then shower, breakfast and all the important stuff. My son made it into school, I headed into work. My horrible colleague, who I am in fact line manager, was there, and I frankly avoided her. She is a snarling, abrupt type of person, all stick and no softness and I simply cannot deal with her. I made some very strong coffee and got on with the business of the day.

    One of the business items was printing out some documents for my passport application. Then on to the usual rush. At 12noon my own line manager spoke to me in our usual scheduled meeting, and then a rushed lunch. At 2pm I had my own meeting with hideous colleague.

    To my marvel and delight, she gave me her notice. This is fantastic news, she has had formal complaints about her behaviour from several quarters and all of it waived out of hand by my boss. But she is gone, away to a team that maybe or maybe not will be a better fit, but it is not my problem.

    I left at the usual time and took my son to his gym session. He gets on very well with two of the boys there, a development that gives me a stab of anxiety; I am no good at being liked, I fear the same fate for him. Then home, dinner, wash up, making lunches.

    The air is delightful. The prospect is positive. A major hurdle to happiness is gone. Oh, happy happy day!

  • Sunday 25th May 2025

    So, this is my third blog in three weeks; I managed to create and then lose two separate blogs. They are around here somewhere, rudderless things without owners. I forgo memorising the passwords, and so, well, here we are.

    The idea of something creative every day is something I’ve been aiming to work towards for a very long time. I have, in my time, written books, plays, put together radio shows and comedy sketches. Now, however, I am very much a lesser creature, it seems; the words and the creativity is left behind somewhere in another country, and I’ve sailed on to this one where the language and customs are different.

    I am a cheerful lump tonight, am I not? I’m still getting over large nuclear events from several years ago, as well as a small stab of fear from just last week: it was thought I had cancer. Now it is thought I do not. The ‘saved from certain death’ whiplash takes quite a bit of time to get used to, and the remarkable nature of birdsong, of freedom, of all of it, is very impactful. Who I am and what I am is still reactionary, but like one of those sonic jewelry cleaners, a shape or two is becoming apparent.

    Goodnight, you, where every you are. Sleep well.

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